Special Delivery  - Heidi Cullinan I've enjoyed a number of Heidi Cullinan's books in the past, but had put this one off for a long time based upon the menage/open relationship aspects of the book, which are just things that don't always personally work for me in a story. As you can see from my rating, I am more than glad that I finally picked this one up. In between all the kinky sex is a well written emotional story of Sam's struggle to accept himself without shame, kinks and all.

Sam is 21 years old, living with and working for his disapproving aunt and passive uncle since his mother passed away several years ago. The fact that he is an imposition on them and their standing in the community is something she doesn't ever let Sam forget. Sam is gay and takes his pleasure where he can find it whether it is sucking off straight boys at school or a by appointment regular hook up. There is no emotional relationship and Sam secretly revels in being used. His mother always told him he should only have sex with love, but Sam's desires run towards being used hard and humiliated, hopefully one day with more than one man at a time, and he is ashamed to feel this way.

A chance meeting with 33 year old trucker Mitch in the alley behind the pharmacy he works at leads to some mind blowing sex that Sam cannot forget. When Mitch comes through town again, he offers Sam (who Mitch has nicknamed Sunshine) the opportunity to travel with him. Soon Sam is living out all his hidden kinky fantasies, but Mitch is hiding something and Sam is determined to find out what it is and why it is causing Mitch to hold back.

This book is full of filthy, hot, kinky sex, often with more than just Sam and Mitch and at times in public. This book is also full of emotion and a story of Sam's coming of age and learning to deal with being ashamed of what he wants. I was in tears more than once as Sam realizes what he wants from his life and tries to navigate his relationship with Mitch. Most of the time they spend together is over a two week period in the close confines of Mitch's semi, which forces them to open up and deal honestly with each other. The relationship is intense and Sam is vulnerable and confused, but he goes into everything willingly and Mitch is always there willing to stop at the drop of a word.

There are a few secondary characters, but the one that stands out is Mitch's old friend Randy, who came on as a slimy, creep, but eventually redeemed himself to the extent that I can't wait to read his story.